Overcoming Food Guilt and Developing a Healthy Eating Mindset
Confronting the Toxic Influence of Diet Culture
During a recent pantry clean-out, I came across a package boldly proclaiming itself a "Guilt Free Snack." Instinctively, I rolled my eyes and muttered a few choice words about the pervasive influence of diet culture. Upon reflection, I realized my reaction wasn't just a result of my heightened sensitivity as a mental health professional, but rather a deep-seated frustration with the years of harm this type of language has inflicted on countless individuals.
I vividly recall watching a Rachel Ray special where she flippantly remarked that drinking calories was pointless and costly and encouraged viewers to opt for water instead. Or the infamous 100-calorie snack campaigns that insidiously targeted children and teens. Is it any wonder that we find ourselves drawn to foods promising to be "guilt-free"? We've been relentlessly conditioned to apologize for enjoying, liking, or loving food!
As a passionate advocate for healing our relationship with food and our bodies, I want to share some of my favorite strategies for kicking food guilt to the curb once and for all.
Unveiling the Truth Behind Food Guilt
Sometimes, it’s really not about the Pasta (yes, I’m referencing Vanderpump Rules). Food guilt is the pervasive and often debilitating experience of shame or guilt surrounding the act of eating or the aftermath of consuming food.
In Atlas of The Heart, renowned researcher and storyteller Brené Brown astutely defines guilt as the belief that "I did something bad," with the focus primarily on behavior. She elaborates, "Guilt is the discomfort we feel when we evaluate what we've done or failed to do against our values." However, I invite you to consider: whose values are we measuring ourselves against? There is an overwhelmingly high probability that these internalized negative beliefs about food have been distorted by the pervasive influence of diet culture, coupled with the relentless promotion and normalization of disordered eating behaviors.
As a society, we've been inundated with messages that demonize certain foods, glorify restrictive eating patterns, and perpetuate the notion that our worth is intrinsically tied to our body size and food choices. This toxic narrative has created a breeding ground for food guilt, robbing us of the inherent pleasure and nourishment that food can provide.
It's crucial that we recognize the origins of these harmful beliefs and actively work to dismantle them. By critically examining the values we've internalized and consciously rejecting those that do not serve our well-being, we can begin to cultivate a more compassionate, intuitive relationship with food and our bodies.
Cultivating Mindfulness and Self-Compassion
By regularly engaging with these mindfulness-based questions, we can cultivate a greater sense of self-awareness, compassion, and resilience in the face of food guilt. Take a look below:
When I experience guilt or shame around eating, can I pause and observe the thoughts and emotions that arise without judgment? What sensations do I notice in my body?
As I sit with these feelings of guilt, can I trace their origins? Are these beliefs truly aligned with my personal values, or have they been influenced by external sources such as diet culture, media, or societal expectations?
If a dear friend or loved one confided in me about their own experiences with food guilt, what compassionate advice would I offer them? Can I extend that same kindness and understanding to myself?
In moments of food guilt, can I shift my focus from self-criticism to gratitude? Can I appreciate the nourishment, pleasure, and social connection that food provides, rather than fixating on perceived "rules" or restrictions?
As I reflect on my relationship with food, what are the values and intentions that truly resonate with me? How can I align my eating habits with these authentic desires, rather than conforming to externally imposed standards?
Embracing a Balanced, Nourishing Relationship with Food
In a world inundated with conflicting nutrition advice and ever-changing diet trends, it's natural to wonder what kinds of foods constitute a "good" or "healthy" diet. The truth is, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. A nourishing, balanced diet can include a wide variety of foods, tailored to your unique needs, preferences, and lifestyle (barring, of course, any serious allergies or medically-necessary restrictions).
It's crucial to recognize that each of our bodies is unique, with distinct nutritional requirements and responses to different foods. What works for one person may not be optimal for another, and that's perfectly okay. We are all on our own individual journeys of self-discovery, learning to honor our body's innate wisdom and make choices that support our overall well-being.
What absolutely does not work for anyone, however, is falling down the rabbit hole of "Victoria's Secret Model Diet" videos on YouTube, only to emerge feeling inadequate, ashamed, and disconnected from our own bodies.
Navigating Food Guilt with DBT Skills
When you find yourself caught in a spiral of guilt or anxiety about a "healthy vs unhealthy" food choice, take a moment to pause and practice mindfulness. Bring your attention to the present moment, noticing your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Acknowledge the presence of guilt or anxiety, but remind yourself that these emotions do not define you or your worth. The healthiest thing at that moment is to eat the food you're having anxiety about. All foods belong in a balanced and fulfilling diet. Speak to an expert, like a Registered Dietician, for educated quality guidance!
Empowering Mantras to Embrace Food and Body Freedom
Last but not least, here are some mantras you can try and make your own:
I have the right to eat without guilt
I have the right to feel good about my body
I have the right to accept my body
I have the right to say yes to things I want to eat
I have the right to silence ED thoughts
I have the right to shut down diet culture talk
I have the right to nourish my body
I have the right to love my life
Reclaiming Your Relationship with Food and Your Body
Healing from food guilt and the toxic influence of diet culture is a journey, and it requires patience, self-compassion, and a willingness to challenge the status quo. By bringing mindfulness to our experiences, practicing self-compassion, and embracing a balanced, nourishing relationship with food, we can gradually untangle ourselves from the web of guilt and shame.
Remember, your worth is not defined by the food you eat or the size of your body. You are inherently worthy of love, respect, and nourishment, just as you are. By reclaiming your autonomy and learning to trust your body's innate wisdom, you can cultivate a joyful, authentic relationship with food and with yourself.
About the Author
I'm Brianna, a licensed therapist and the founder of On Par Therapy NYC, a counseling practice helping ambitious women in New York and Florida reduce anxiety, build confidence, and find balance.
Blending compassionate care with goal-oriented action plans, I work primarily with female executives, entrepreneurs, and grads seeking empathetic yet practical support. My specialty is nurturing resilience, emotional agility, and inner peace so you can show up as your best self both personally and professionally.
I draw upon research-backed modalities like CBT and mindfulness while customizing evidence-based insights for busy, growth-oriented women. If you feel overwhelmed juggling wellness with demanding work, relationships, or perfectionist tendencies, I provide a non-judgmental space to explore your needs.
Whether you're struggling with specific symptoms or seeking general life balance and purpose, let's chat. Reach out to info@onpartherapynyc.com to schedule a complimentary introduction call today. I'm here to help you reclaim stability, self-care, and belonging.
