The Space Between: Finding Your Way Through Sobriety This Season
It starts so innocently, doesn't it? A glass of wine after a difficult client meeting. A round of shots to celebrate your friend's promotion. That "well-deserved" nightcap after making it through another day of meetings. In a world that's constantly telling us to hustle harder, drink better, and somehow do it all with a smile, taking a step back from alcohol can feel like swimming upstream.
But here you are, reading this, perhaps feeling that gentle tug of curiosity about what life might look like with a little more clarity.
The Questions We Don't Ask Out Loud
Let's be honest – we've gotten really good at justifying our relationship with alcohol. "It's just one drink." "Everyone else is doing it." "I had a rough day." The narratives are so familiar they've become comfortable, like a well-worn sweater we're not quite ready to let go of. But what if, just for a moment, we allowed ourselves to sit with the uncomfortable questions:
What are we running toward when we reach for that drink?
What are we running from?
There's no judgment in these questions. No right or wrong answers. Just the quiet space to explore what's true for you.
The Reality No One Talks About
Here's what they don't tell you in the glossy magazine articles about going sober: It's not always about hitting rock bottom or having a dramatic wake-up call. Sometimes, it's the subtle realizations:
- The way Monday mornings feel heavier than they need to
- How "just one drink" has become your autopilot response to both celebration and stress
- That nagging question of whether you're using alcohol to enhance your life or escape from it
Beyond the Labels
This isn't about becoming "sober" or "not sober." It's not about perfect streaks or never touching a drop again. It's about creating space – space to feel, to think, to simply be present in your own life without the buffer of alcohol.
Maybe that means experimenting with Dry January. Maybe it means being more intentional about when and why you drink. Or maybe it just means starting to pay attention to the role alcohol plays in your life, without immediately trying to change anything.
Finding Your Way
There's no roadmap for this journey because it's uniquely yours. But here's what we know helps:
Start with curiosity instead of judgment
Replace "should" with "could"
Build a toolkit that goes beyond willpower (think: meditation, movement, meaningful connections)
Give yourself permission to experiment, adjust, and change your mind
Your Next Step
Take a breath. Notice what comes up for you as you read this. Whatever you're feeling – resistance, relief, curiosity, fear – it's all valid. It's all information.
If you're feeling ready to explore this territory, start small:
Pick one drinking occasion this week to approach differently
Get curious about your triggers without trying to change them
Journal about what role alcohol plays in your life story
Remember: This exploration doesn't have to be perfect, dramatic, or even permanent. It just has to be honest.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Brianna Paruolo
LMHC Clinical Director
Founder
Meet Brianna, the Founder Behind On Par Therapy.
As the founder of On Par Therapy and a trusted voice in women's mental health, I understand firsthand the unique pressures high-achieving women face. My journey from the corporate world to becoming a recognized expert in mental health has taught me one crucial truth: you don't have to sacrifice your mental health for success.
Whether you're battling burnout, rebuilding after a toxic relationship, or simply feeling disconnected from yourself beneath your achievements, I'm here to help you thrive, not just survive.
Licensed in NY, NJ, FL & SC, I offer virtual therapy that fits your demanding schedule, making expert mental health support accessible wherever you are.
